Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Randomize
