I heard we made out
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
You are a genius and a whore.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
