their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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