Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
