Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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