Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
