I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize