If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
