so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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