I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
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