I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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