I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
