sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
