can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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