she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize