This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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