five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
