I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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