wrigley field is MILF paradise
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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