he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize