why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
