she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
