we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
