I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
