How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Oh god it's open bar.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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