There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
