Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
It's blow job season.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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