I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize