I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Randomize
