Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
