I wannas sexs uuuuu
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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