Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
