Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
