so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize