But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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