Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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