She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
