Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Randomize
