I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
