'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
