i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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