I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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