no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
