she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
