I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
im having a threesome with these popsicles
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Randomize
