So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
My ass is underappreciated
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize