Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
