..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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