Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
