Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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