he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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